...And Your Heavenly Father Knows That You Need Them

I’ve wanted to write a passage like this for a long, long time, and truthfully, it’s been a long time coming!            

     I’ve felt very dry lately, having come through the fire of unemployment for almost a whole year, and losing yet two other potential jobs in the meantime.  My thoughts have been turning rather negative, depressing, and unfortunately, selfish.  But now I feel like I’ve renewed my choice for God, and that’s all I really needed to do for wheels to start spinning the other way.  The spiritual and financial “cogs” that had started grinding to a halt have started moving again.  At church today (May 27^th), the weekend after my initial training at my new job, I felt almost as if my past, and all the negative thoughts and self doubt that have been swirling around me for the last year, now seemed far below me, as if at the bottom of the murky ocean, way down there with all the weird looking fish and eels and bottom sea dwellers that look more like bizarre alien creatures than they do like fish, living down there in the mud and muck that make up the ocean floor.  

     I, on the other hand, felt that I was on a mountain top far removed from the ocean, or that I was actually starting to float above the mountain, and that God had let me know that He was there, and had always been there, and that the power of mine and other people’s prayers were being answered:  Kim, who told me she had gotten down on her knees for me, Mom, Terry & Darece and their Bible group, family and friends and former co-workers, and I had prayed too, more for Mom than even for myself, and, after writing prayer request on the giving envelope, the church staff on the very day I got the news about the new job.  I felt the love and support.  Yet it leaves me feeling like my love for Jesus is so conditional! 

     And still God reaches me.  They said a prayer in church for the fallen soldiers who died protecting us, some who were family members of church patrons, and it actually moved me to tears!  I thought about that Bible passage that says something about the things of Jesus’ heart becoming the things of our hearts.  I felt God’s presence and I felt that God was perhaps blessing me and helping me in my time of need.  I don’t know if that’s true, but it sure felt that way. 

     And truthfully, I don’t know how I’ll feel if the same kind of thing happens again, and I am let go at yet another job because I’m “not the right fit”.  I do know that, despite it being only a long term temp position, that it came along at just the right time, and that everything seems to be pointing to this job right now as a light and the right thing, in many, many ways!  And I need to praise God for this blessing!

Image from: http://johnkrohn.blogspot.com/2012/05/when-mom-is-standing-there.html