American Idol
I love Phillip
Phillips! He may be eccentric in his
singing, and a bit too laid back otherwise, but what a talent! I’ve downloaded nearly all his songs, though
truthfully, some are better than others.
He’s unique. I also love Hollie. I can see what the judges are saying about
her sometimes over-thinking her performances, or not having the soul of Jessica
and Joshua, but so what? Soul has its
own problems, and while the audience seems to love every performance by every
person, and the judges give standing ovations to the soul performers almost
exclusively, soul music still only appeals to one niche in the grand scheme of
the music world. The judges need to keep
that in perspective, like they do for country music. Just because it’s the kind of music they
favor in particular doesn’t mean it’s the kind of music everyone likes. And like Phillip, but in a different way,
Hollie is also a talent, and an often maligned one. While the judges have primarily been very
hard on her, she’s stuck around week after week after week, and I’ve downloaded
some amazing performances of hers: “All
the Man That I Need,” “The Power of Love,” “Perfect,” “Rolling in the Deep,”
and “The Climb,” among others.
I’ve downloaded a few of Joshua and
Jessica’s, when they’re more restrained, including their duet together “I Knew
You Were Waiting (For Me)”. When they’re
not screaming, or being egged on to scream even more by the judges’ constant
praise when they do, they seem to do a very good job, and I liked Joshua
singing Stevie Wonder’s “I Wish” and “Ready for Love,” while Jessica has done
an amazing job on songs by the late Whitney Houston: “I Will Always Love You” and “How Will I
Know,” as well as a wonderful rendition of Luther Vandros’ “Dance with My
Father”.
Then there’s Skylar and Colton, who
did an amazing job on the duet “Islands in the Stream”. It took me a bit to warm up to them. I thought Skylar possessed some of the
qualities I find difficult to like in today’s modern country music
landscape: Namely, an affinity for rock
and roll, and I didn’t like her as much as, say, Scotty McCreery and Lauren
Alaina from last season, or Kellie Pickler from season 5. But later, I really enjoyed her versions of
old classics like “Wind Beneath My Wings” and “I Heard It Through the
Grapevine.” In fact, upon review, she
hasn’t really had a bad performance.
It’s just that, usually, they are not quite as good as some of the other
performer’s good performances in any given week. For instance, on the week where the
performers did a Queen song and then a more modern choice, most of the
performers had one good performance and one bad performance (or, in the case of
Elise, two bad performances), but even though Skyler’s were both good, they
weren’t among the best (which, for that week, were “Dance with My Father” by
Jessica, “The Climb” by Hollie, “Ready for Love” by Joshua, and “Fat Bottomed
Girls” by Phillip). Likewise, I didn’t
care much for Colton at first, and on the week he was voted out, he messed up
with unimpressive versions of Lady Gaga’s “Bad Romance” and a slow piano
version of Earth, Wind and Fire’s “September”.
Yet at the beginning of the competition, I didn’t think I’d like any of
his performances, and I was surprised when I found myself downloading “Piano
Man,” “Time After Time,” and “Love the Way You Lie.”
That just leaves a handful of people
who might have been better if they had been afforded an opportunity to stay
longer or to grow. This group includes
the baritone, gentle giant Jermaine (not so gentle, apparently, since the
reason he left early was for not admitting his arrest record) Erika Van Pelt,
and Heejun Han.
Finally, there’s Elise. Sure, she has some talent, but it wore thin
over the weeks, and her personality stunk.
She was not very gracious, and definitely not a gracious loser. Think of her as a worse version of Haley
Reinhart. As snotty as my brother and
his wife thought Haley was, Elise was snottier, and though Elise did have a
unique tone to her voice, it wasn’t as unique or as pleasant as Haley’s. I’m glad Elise is gone. She didn’t deserve to win, and everyone was
nicer than her.
Dancing with the Stars
The big, goony
klutz this year, similar to Macy Gray and Penn Jillette from previous seasons,
was Martina Navratilova, though I thought it was sad to see professional Tony
Dovolani go so soon. Of the other
performers already voted out, most of them were not that strong, like Jack
Wagner, though Sherri Shepherd and Gavin DeGraw will be missed leaving so soon,
as I really liked both of their personalities, and Sherri had some real dancing
talent! Gladys Knight hung on much too
long in my opinion, though she did pretty well for being the oldest
contestant. I also liked all their
dancing partners (Anna Trebunskaya for Jack Wagner, Karina Smirnoff for Gavin
DeGraw, Tristan MacManus for Gladys Knight) except that Sherri’s partner, Val
Chmerkovskiy, Maksim’s brother, really rubs me the wrong way! And several news stories and rumors about
Jaleel White of “Urkel” fame, paired with Kym Johnson, have circulated that
he’s not the nicest guy around!
Of those remaining, Melissa Gilbert,
paired with Maks, should thank her lucky stars she made it this far! She is trying, but she is the weakest of all
the dancers remaining. And Roshon Fegan
of Disney Channel fame, paired with Chelsie Hightower, is technically
proficient and a natural dancing talent, yet I find it interesting he has been
in the bottom two a few times now, after good performances, so despite his
talent, he doesn’t stand the best chance of winning.
That leaves a few sports figures, a
classical singer, and an obscure Latin heartthrob dueling it out, and any of
the four of them could win. Wrestler
Maria Menounos with the horrible laugh is paired with Derek Hough, which is
reason enough to believe she could win, yet the others are good enough to give
Derek a run for his money this year.
Donald Driver, teamed with Peta Murgatroyd, has given this newcomer a
much better chance at the trophy than who she was paired with last time around
(Mehta Worldpeace; giggle). However, on
mere looks alone, Latin star William Levy, paired with Cheryl Burke, is the
most popular, and nobody really knows who he is. Still, I’m rooting for
classical vocalist Katherine Jenkins and her partner Mark Ballas. As a close friend of Derek’s, Mark is
choreographing some great routines, and Jenkins has some dancing ability, and
she’s cute. Still, they might make a
cuter couple if Mark would grow his hair out.
That haircut is way too severe if you ask me!
Celebrity Apprentice
I was surprised
that my favorite two players turned out to be Arsenio Hall and Clay Aiken, who
actually work well together! They seem
to keep cool under pressure (usually, but not always), and seem to have the
best business sense. My least favorite
players are Lisa Lampanelli and Aubrey O’Day, though surprisingly (or maybe not
so surprisingly) they are my twin brother’s favorites! Lisa’s one of those loud and aggressive
female comedians in the same vein as Kathy Griffin and Sarah Silverman, so she
already has at least a dozen strikes against her just for that, and Aubrey
sings and acts, but what she’s most known for is posing nude for playboy, which
just shows you where her morals are!
Lisa has a mouth, an attitude, and a demeaning manner, talking down to
everyone, and has quite the temper!
Meanwhile, Aubrey’s number one fan is Aubrey, and like Lisa, she has a
tendency to think less of everyone around her than she thinks of herself. No wonder she and Lisa got along so
well! I can’t tell you the number of
times each of them said they had to carry the team, and though Lisa was sometimes
correct saying this, expecially when she had Lou Ferrigno on her team, Aubrey
was just plain wrong saying such things about Arsenio Hall. The two of them together, Lisa and Aubrey,
actually reminded me of the two witches at my former job who devised my
removal. Sitting in my final “meeting”
with them, I felt like Clay Aiken or Cheryl Tiegs. Fighting loud or self-centered women like
that just isn’t my thing, and in hindsight, it was obviously orchestrated, and
simply unfair.
I liked most of the celebrities more
than I thought I would, and that included Penn Jillette and Adam Carolla, who
certainly couldn’t dance when they were on Dancing
with the Stars. I liked Cheryl
Tiegs, and thought she was voted out way too early (it’s a compliment to say
she was too nice for such a cutthroat competition), and Tia Carrere, and
Patricia Velasquez, who I remembered as Anck Su Namun, the Mummy’s vicious
bride, from the first two Brendan Frasier Mummy movies, and even Dee Snider of
Twisted Sister fame. Would you believe,
I thought even George Takei was okay, though Mom couldn’t stand him, and when I
imitated him, my sister and her girls thought it was funny, but Mom didn’t! I also liked Paul Teutul Sr. and Michael
Andretti, though they seemed laid back and didn’t do a whole lot. I thought model and Ms. Universe Dayana
Mendoza put up the good fight, but didn’t have the stamina or the brains for
such competitive, corporate shenanigans, and that goes double for Housewives of
New Jersey star Teresa Giudice. Victoria
Gotti was just about useless, though having mob connections, people were afraid
to say such things (should I be worried now?), and Lou Ferrigno was almost as
bad. He could do little else other than
pose and be the Hulk, and he knew it!
Debbie Gibson was the same, trying to recapture her previous 15 minutes
of fame, but without one half the talent of Clay Aiken, or, much as I hate to
admit it because she’s so self-centered, shallow, and immoral, Aubrey
O’Day! I’m just glad I don’t have to
hear Gibson’s nasally “Pomtini – In the Garden of Crystal Light” jingle
again! They actually had the gall to
hand that out as keepsakes!
Survivor: One World
Finally, here’s
ten things to know about this season of Survivor:
- Colton, the
selfish, spoiled,
ber-gay guy who identified more with the
women and somehow managed to steer the entire direction of the game, was quite
the little, limp-wristed villain! (I’m
not being homophobic here because Colton would be the first to describe himself
as a limp-wristed flamer!) He treated Bill
as a second class citizen (was it because he’s black or a stand up comedian?)
and had a strong alliance with another villain, Alicia, telling Christina he
didn’t care if she fell into the fire or got voted out. His supposed case of appendicitis was probably
God speaking. - There were a lot of idiots on this season! Read on!
- Christina is not too bright. She consistently voted with the women, even when it was obvious she was the one on the very bottom.
- Tarzan (real name Greg) is a plastic surgeon in real life but didn’t talk or act like he had a brain in his head! I now wish I had written down some of his dialogue during tribal councils, because it was hilarious, but not even Wikiquote had it catalogued!
- Leif, the short person who had a nice personality, was also not very sharp. Along with Tarzan, he stuck with the women, even though it was obvious the women were voting out all the men. When Troyzan won immunity, the women, of course, went to the other remaining men, and Leif was gone, only because he was a bit smarter and less useless than Tarzan.
- Kat was the epitome of the stereotype “dumb blond” and didn’t even know what appendicitis or an appendix was. When Colton was removed from the game for suspected appendicitis, Kat looked shocked and said she hoped she didn’t get it!
- Kim probably thinks of herself as a good person, but she should watch footage of her expression each time her plan works and one of the guys is voted out. None of the other women seem to understand that she is the mastermind, not even Christina and Kat, who are on the chopping block once all the guys disappear! In fact, Kat was just voted out before Tarzan!
- Jonas is an all-round nice guy, but didn’t have a backbone. He followed Colton unquestioningly, and when the women took control, he was voted out first simply because, unlike some of the more macho and conceited guys that had already been voted out, he was the nicest, hardest working, and amiable guy around. I think Jonas should win the favorite or most likable player this year.
- Jay may look like a normal guy, but he has a weird, little kid voice.
- I’m sure I can’t be the only one who groaned over the fact that two guys, Greg and Troy, went by either Troyzan or Tarzan. Give me a break!
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